I was allowed to go home today. Pain under control? Check. Drinking plenty of fluids? Check. Eating sufficient amount of food? Check. Emptying bowels? Oh dear. That wasn't going to happen anytime soon. The pain medication binds you up and my anxiety issues weren't helping. We had to come up with a plan of attack. Amongst other things I wasn't allowed to rest very much, just walk, walk, walk to get everything moving.
What I did notice walking around for those few hours was the reaction of others. At this point I had severe bruising down my neck and chest, sticking plaster across my chin and excessive swelling busting out from behind the plaster. It wasn't a pretty sight. I couldn't smile or barely say anything so probably, no definitely, a bit confronting for some. Most people looked down when walking past. Some stared from a distance and a minor few enquired how I was. It was an insight to me.
I felt so lucky that I was getting better. What if I was unfortunate and had a permanent disfigurement like others bear every day? To be treated like a freak was just horrible. I actually used this time to do a little experiment and to keep my self occupied. I just wanted to see different reactions. In 4 hours of walking around the hospital, out of all of the people passing, I had 4 conversations or communications if you like, in the biggest hospital on The Gold Coast. Amazing!
One was a patient that was also walking laps, another was a patient in a wheelchair that was analysing my laps, yelling out "your on a roll now love! You've lost your walking frame!" He made me laugh, which at that point was unfortunately quite painful. A cleaner and tea lady stopped several times to chat but I could see how uncomfortable everyone else was. It didn't hurt me, I just found human behaviour fascinating.
Anyway a few hours later, success. I could go home. I felt fantastic, well compared to the previous days. I stopped to pick up some groceries, with no heavy lifting as instructed by the hospital.
After a long rest, I thought I would really study my face again in the mirror. I opened my lips a little and could see my teeth resting together. I really wanted to smile but it hurt too much. I just kept opening and closing my jaw ever so slightly so I could see my teeth lining up. That's when I thought, " This is going to be great! I love it! I will look amazing!
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